Stop the Mom Comparison Trap
How many times have you been scrolling Instagram to find yourself wondering, how does she do it? Her house is so clean! How the hell does she get her kids to play quietly at the table while cooking dinner? Or my favorite; the mommy Facebook groups. On one hand, they are so helpful! Tons of advice at your fingertips, but on the other hand….a ton of criticism and doubt at your fingertips. It is totally a catch 22. I find social media super helpful with navigating my life as a mom, but only when I am able to stop the mom comparison trap.
Cleanse the Negativity
How do I stop the mom comparison trap? That is a great question and I really don’t have an answer for you, as it is an ongoing problem I think most of us have. First of all, you have to understand most of us only put the good on social media. I think there is a new wave of moms posting real life pictures and stories, which I love! Relatable content is so much better than fake perfection, and something I am striving to do and share. If the mommy group you are in is making you feel bad, leave the group! If there is someone you follow that makes you feel less than, un-follow them! I think it is important to identify people and situations that bring you down. Think of it as a social cleanse and get rid of the negativity it brings you!
Take a Moment for Gratitude
Something I have learned to do throughout the day, specifically first thing in the morning and the last thing at night is to list out what I am grateful for. Taking the time to think of the little things that makes me happy really puts me in the right place, starting and ending my day’s right. I find this extremely helpful in tough situations with my kids. When they are screaming in the car, or throwing a tantrum when I am trying to do a diaper change; I just think of how grateful I am to be in this moment with my healthy child. How lucky I am to be their mother. Sure, its extremely annoying and frustrating when they scream and cry during you 45 minute commute home… but at least they have healthy lungs to scream with….right? 😉 What I am trying to say is….next week will it really matter how much they screamed on that car ride home? I think it is easy to feel overwhelmed in life with littlies and get in the mindset that it is easier for everyone else but you. I am here to tell you it is hard for everyone. If anyone ever says otherwise, they most definitely are a liar! 😉
Mommin’ Aint Easy
This shit is hard. Like really, really hard, but oh so rewarding. I feel like every day I am counting down the minutes until bedtime so I can relax and get some peace and quiet, but about 30 minutes after bed I just want to snuggle with my kids! It is easy to look back at the day and be so hard on yourself. Looking at the failures instead of achievements. Just remember, you kept your kids alive another day! They are such sweet loving little babies and it breaks my heart that at times I feel I am not a good enough mom to them.
Change Your Perspective
From here on out lets make a promise to ourselves. Focus on the positive, not the negative. List all you have to be grateful for. When you look back at your crazy hectic day, thing of 5 things that made you smile. I will start and end every day with love, prayer, and gratitude, and I hope you will do the same!
Questions for you!
What are 3 things that made you smile today? Nolan saying “no more!” with his hands up when I was tickling him (it was SO cute), Olivia asking “what are we doing today, maybe later”-gotta love a conversation with a 3 year old, and having a date day over the weekend at the spa with my hubby!
What is something that was terrible in the moment, but now looking back you can laugh? When I opened my sons door today, he had no pants or diaper on…which means there was poop somewhere!!! Instantly panicking, I found the dirty diaper still in his pants pushed away in the drawer. Miraculously all the poop stayed tucked away in the diaper and pants and there was little cleanup! Thank goodness.